A Different Kind of Christmas

As a child I dreamed of making cookies with my parents, putting candy canes on the tree (eating a few while mom was in the kitchen), Christmas Dinner with ham, mashed potatoes, gravy, and all of those other wonderfully bad things to eat, I remember watching Mickey's Christmas Carol with buttered popcorn, and Hot Cocoa with extra chocolate and more peppermint.

Yet this Christmas is not filled with candy canes, buttered popcorn, or even Extra chocolate hot cocoa. Why? Why is this Christmas so different? This Christmas is the first Christmas my two best men, (my father and Fiance) are going to be healthy. The air not filled with Gingerbread, or sugar cookies, nor is the tree trimmed with candy canes. But Guess what....

It's ok. It does not have to be the candy filled Christmas, or even a Christmas that we eat so much we take a nap after eating. This is a Christmas that my men are healthy, and happy, and they are gaining better lives. For that I am extremely proud. So instead, We make healthy cookies (which by the way, are REALLY good!) we drink Hot Tea instead of Hot Cocoa, we decorate the tree with home made decorations, instead of Candy, and we watch movies eating pretzels instead of Popcorn. Even though it's a different kind of Christmas... It's a good Christmas after all.

Giving it ALL to God

Thus far in my life I have been trying to do everything on my own. I accepted Christ at a young age, but I have not been dependent on Him for my peace. In going through my study of the names of God (an excellent one by the way) I found one and it stopped me. Yahweh Shalom. The Lord is Peace. My God, the ruler of the Heavens and Earth is a God of Peace. He wants me, as His child to be at peace. Where am I?

If you were to create a person that is the opposite of the definition of peace you would probably get me. I prefer my life to be drama free, but when it comes to trials, tribulation, and worry. I take the cake. I worry about everything from family safety, to if I will get an A, from the responce of people, to if I'm pleasing God. It got to the point last year were I would have to take medicine to keep me from getting sick because of my worrying. My dad has always joked I'll have an ulcer by the time I'm 30. I thought he was kidding, but now, he may be right.

I don't even know why I hold back on giving it to God. Pride? Control? Selfishness? Whatever it is, I cannot live like that anymore. I am a child of God, the God of peace, and as such I need to begin to give everything to my Father. So, as my siblings in Christ, I am asking you to keep me accountable. Help remind me not to worry, and that my God, my Father, My Lord of Peace has it all in control.

Life

This past week has pushed me to the highs and lows of emotion and spiritual endurance. I have wept for unsaved people, I have laughed so hard I cried, and I have been frustrated to the point of exhaustion. I feel like the opening line in A Tale of Two Cities "It was the best of times, and it was the worst of times..."

Through the roller coaster of the week I found something amazing. I found my self craving church. I could not wait to get to church or to talk to Steve about a passage I read. Sure I knew that God draws us near to himself when we experience hard times, but to experience the pull brings it to a whole new level. God knew the
verses I needed to hear, the smiles I needed to see, and the prayers I needed to say and He worked it out so I could experience all of this. God knows my needs and will supply exactly what I need at exactly the right time.

Dear God, Thank you for drawing me closer to You when I needed you the most. You know me so well. Thank you for giving me the strength to get through this week and the blessing church has become for me. Help me to always remember to draw close to you.

My Family

For most, family means the people you see on Thanksgiving and Christmas, the people who you go see on special occasions. My friends talk about family and I'll hear them say, "I have to go call my mom again. She cant go more than a week without hearing from me." or "My Dad is such a pain sometimes, he has to make sure I'm doing everything right!" It breaks my heart to hear statements like that. To hear people talk about their family as if they are to be put up with.

I call my Mom every other day almost. I talk to my sister at least once a week. As for Daddy and I, well its quite frequent. I'm fortunate enough to have my Uncle live in the area. I meet him every Wednesday night to eat out. I talk to my Uncle in Iowa City on a regular basis. My family means everything to me.

God has blessed me so much with these people. I love spending time with them and enjoying their company. Family time is very important to me. God has blessed me with the most wonderful people to be related to. We don't always get along, but there is one thing that is never absent, and it's love.

Please enjoy your families because we only have a short life on this earth. Each person is a gift from God. Appreciate them, and enjoy time with them. You don't have to like them, but you can ALWAYS love them. <3

Pet Peeve

In reading others writings I find some so helpful and uplifting. I enjoy reading of others day to day activities as well as reading their struggles and successes. Over all I have found one new pet peeve through this. I cannot stand it when people bash their husbands or significant other. My family is sarcastic and we joke about it, but we never post it and make it known how displeased we are with each other.

I'm not married yet, I know, but some of the godly women I follow never rant how their husbands didn't do something, or how terrible they were that day. Although I will not always get along with Steve, I hope I never write about him the way some women do their husbands. He is a gift God has given me and to treat him like that is down right awful.

May I always be thankful for the man You have given me. May I submit to him, and love him. Thank you for everything God. Amen

Unworthy

As I was relaxing tonight, a thought struck me. This though is not profound nor is it new to me, but it hit me in a way I had never thought of it before. I was thinking of my parents. They are paying my way for so many things, clothes, an education, food, and so much more. Why? Why do my parents pay my way, I am such a burdon sometimes. I don't deserve this. I did nothing to earn this. They are paying my way because they love me.

Even as I finished that thought I thought of my Heavenly Father. He has payed my way with His own son's blood. God gives me SO much! He provides food, shelter, loving family and friends, my every need and sometimes even my wants. Why? There is no good thing I have done without the Holy Spirit. There is nothing on my own I could do to deserve even the smallest thing from God, much less Him paying my way to Heaven with Christ's blood.

Unworthy. I feel humbled by everything that is done for me. I have done absolutly nothing do deserve any of this, yet God saw it fit to fulfil my ever need and even some of my hopes and dreams. My God truly is an awsome God. Thank you, God, for loving me.

An Unexpected Present

Yesterday I celibrated my 6 month anniversary with my fiance. He bought me a frozen coffee, one of my favorite drinks, and I bought him a soda. I had also made cards with different attributes on it that spell out his name. Simple gifts are the ones that make up our relationship, and I totally accept that.

Today Steve asked me to meet him for lunch. I get there and in my place is a bag from our bookstore. I look at him and ask what these are for. He smiles and said open it up. I pull out not one, not two, but three books. They are all by Beverly Lewis, one of my favorite authors.

Thank you, God, for blessing me with my sweet, sweet fiance. He pushes me to strive to be more like You. He surprises me with gifts, and spoils me with his love. Help me to be a godly fiance and to encourage him in any way I can. Thank you for loving me so much and blessing me with the life you've given. Amen.

Praise Jesus!

I love my Savior so much, and am ashamed to admit that although I have times where all I want to do is praise Him, I also have times where I want to spend time on me rather than in His word. I find those times I am not as cheerful, I am not as happy, and I lack the over all Joy of the Lord.

Tonight at 12:46, I am so filled with His joy I can hardly sleep. So instead I blog about it. Ha ha! I am so happy with everything God has blessed me with. I try and count my blessings and they are so numerous I can't even begin to list them. God is so good to me all the time. He isn't just faithful when I praise His name at 2 in the morning, but also when I don't always follow Him. He is always there to gently lead me back to His side.

Thank you, O Lord, for your saving Grace, for the love you have allowed me to have in my life through my christian family, through my friends, and through my Godly fiance. Thank you for putting each and every one of them into my life and allowing them to bless me. Thank you for church and how it rejuvinates me throughout the week. Thank you for your Word and how it greatly impacts me all these years after you had the authors pen it. Thank you for being you God. Thank you for your love, your grace, your faithfulness, your mercy, and your salvation for children who turn away from you. I love you God. Amen!

Advice from a Friend

The other night I was with a friend and she asked how I was doing. This friend has known me my whole life and can tell when something is not right, but she chooses to ask anyway. I told her I was alright but frustrated with some aspects of my life. I felt like I was hitting a brick wall, I was frustrated, and there where days I wanted to throw in the towel and not deal with anything.

My friend smiled knowingly and said that she wanted tell me about a relative of hers. Her relative had been having the same relative problem as me. She ended up hating everyone that had anything to do with her faith, and walked away from church because of some people she encountered. My friend said she had never been one to favor man made rules, but rather to follow the Bible and God's rules and respect the others you have to abide by.

My friend told me that she didn't want me to end up like her relative, but rather to keep my faith and to smile through it. Hard times come, and hard times go, but God is there for you no matter what. Don't walk away from Him because of His children you don't always agree with.

It was simple advice, and I was FAR from walking away from my faith, but it helped me get my mind back in the game and regain my focus. God is still there for me even if He put me in a place where I get frustrated sometimes. God still loves me, He still loves to see me succeed, none of that has changed. Thank you God for using my friends to remind me of your simple truths.

É una bella giornata

It is a beautiful day! That is the translation of my Italian title. I made Friday the 13Th my beautiful Italian day. (not intentionally, but it still happened.)

My first meal of the day was lunch (abnormal for me) and Jenny and I decided we wanted pizza. I got out the pizza, and had a fantastic lunch.



Then we went to find Ice Cream. The only thing I love more than Ice Cream is Gelato. We went to Happy Joe's first but on the way decided we wanted to check out a new shop downtown. We found Elle's, A coffee and tea house I HIGHLY recommend. They serve ice cream and... GELATO! I was so excited! Jenny and I had the Toasted Coconut Almond Fudge. It was amazing!



After that we went to the movie Eat Pray Love. It was a good movie. (I wish some scenes where edited better, but I can't help that) One part of the movie was set in, you guessed it, Italy.



That night we where trying to decided where to go as a family. I suggested Italian but not knowing where to go, Jenny suggested Salvatore's. (yet another delicious, and highly recommended, restaurant downtown) We went and my family had pizza and I ordered Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo. It was melt in your mouth delicious. Mom and dad where full by the end, but Jenny and I where ready for sweets. Jenny and I could only think of one thing we wanted, Tiramisu. It was creamy and delicate.




We went home and spent time as a family before going to bed. It was a perfect ending to my beautiful Italian day.

Thank You to Our Heros

This song has been one of my favorites for years. Today I was flipping through the channels hoping against hope that anything would be on. As I fliped to the Country channel the music stopped me. It was my favorite song. I closed my eyes and listened in contentment until the last chord rang out. The song writter, Jimmy Fortune, then started to explain the song. He was So moved by the Vietnam Memorial that he sat down and wrote this. This song is ment not only for the brave soldiers that our freedom is bought with, but for their mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, grandparents, friends, anyone who was touched by their life. This is my way of saying Thank you to not only our service men, but also their families.

More Than a Name on a Wall

I saw her from a distance
As she walked up to the wall
in her hand she held some flowers
as her tears began to fall
and she took out pen and paper
as to trace her memories
and she looked up to heaven
and the words she said were these...

She said Lord my boy was special,
and he meant so much to me
and Oh I'd love to see him
just one more time you see
All I have are the memories
and the moments to recall

So Lord could you tell him,
He's more than a name on a wall..

She said he really missed the family
and being home on Christmas day
and he died for God and Country
in a place so far away

I remember just a little boy
playing war since he was three
But Lord this time I know,
He's not coming home to me

And she said Lord my boy was special,
and he meant so much to me
and Oh I'd love to see him
But I know it just can't be
So I thank you for my memories
and the moments to recall

But Lord could you tell him,
He's more than a name on a wall..

Lord could you tell him,
He's more than a name on a wall..

The Adventures of a Nanny

I have recieved the nickname of Super Nanny from my high school friends. They tell me there is not a kid I am not able to handle. I would definitly NOT go that far,but I do LOVE kids. This summer I secured a nanny job with 3 boys, ages 5, 7, and 9. The biggest lesson I learned? Boys are EXTREEMLY different than girls! It should be obvious to an "old time pro" but these boys are totally taken over by cartoons, frog hunting, snake chasing, and beating each other up.

While I had them they mellowed slightly to frog hunting and disney movies. In observing them over the weeks it finally struck me, boys are just wired different. (lightbulb moment, i know) They do not want to sit down, and read a book. They do not want to play quietly inside all day, instead they want to run, and play, and catch things that make girls go eww, and to be boys.

So, after caring for a boy with a cut foot, having a boy hit his head on a rock in a pond, chase after all three at a public pool, and sit down and watch "Up" with them, God had given me an appreciation for boys. Thank you for making boys and girls different.

End of the Year

So... It is the end of yet another school year. I am burnt out, tired, and ready to crash. I am living out of suitcases at the moment, organizing my necesitys from my excessories and packing. My parents took all of my decorations and extra things around the dorm home yesterday I still feel like there is so much to do... I have to clean out the refrigerator, organize and clean my closet, as well as clean move all the stuff I am keeping here for summer school over to the apartment. *sigh* I am ready to just plain relax.

Wedding Bells?

Where do I begin? First off, my AMAZING and romantic boyfriend proposed and we are now engaged. We are waiting for two years to save up money and to get to know each other more. I am getting very tired of hearing people ask, why don't you just get married now? What's the wait, are you going to back out on him? I love Steven with all of my heart, and will always love him. I am marrying him, but being a good steward of the mind God gave me and using it by not getting married when I'm almost broke. True I will never be fully ready to become a wife. God will have to help me figure that out. All the people that complain asside. I am getting MARRIED!!!!! How crazy is that! I have found the one God made for me! I love him so much and I can't even explain how I feel! I have four words that sum up all my feelings. I AM IN LOVE!

Relaxation and Sleep

Yesterday after church my boyfriend, friend, and I went over the house of some friends from church. They have breakfast after church with EVERYTHING you can imagine! Pancakes, Bacon, Sausage, Quiche, Breakfast Pizza, Oranges, and Apples! For a College student it was Divine! After all of that glorious food, (pun intended) we sat around, drank coffee (a definite bonus), and chatted. I LOVED it! It was the first time in a LONG time that I actually relaxed!

That night... I actually slept!Sleep is a wonderful thing. Especially when you get 8-9 hours of it! I feel so much better. No headache today, I feel rested, and lastly I actually have energy! I was able to get through the day without WANTING a nap. It was a true blessing. :D

Why Blog?

Why should I blog? Well after following my friends and ladies from the church for a while I decided it was time to start my own. I dont know if I will have anyone follow me, however it is more like a journal you can view if you choose. Enjoy the entrys. :D